So a man sends a woman an unsolicited photo of his dick. Nothing unusual about it since a lot of women have had this experience. But what's different is what this woman did in reaction. She forwarded this picture to his mother on Facebook!
I was talking to a woman friend of mine the other day. She said she agreed with my occasional activism on dating sites. Her argument was: who are we to judge the bad behavior of other people? I think that's a very reasonable and magnanimous position to take. I admire her ability to tolerate, or at least brush off, bad behavior. I'm less tolerant. You don't want to be a mad warrior, raging against real and perceived insults, large and small. But, on the other hand, by not speaking out against egregious behavior, are we not encouraging it or being complicit in the act?
The challenge is, what constitutes egregious behavior? When does well-intentioned activism cross the line and degenerate into vigilantism? And what effect does this have on the target and those around them? So when this woman forwarded the dick picture to the man's mother, did she just teach the man a lesson, or did she also shame his mother in the process? Did his mother have to see that picture for him to think twice about doing this again? How do we know that the man even felt any remorse or shame?
I don't have a clear stance on this. I have indulged in what I think is 'activism'. But it is possible it's just a mean-spirited way of taking revenge on unsuspecting individuals for perceived insults I've been at the receiving end of. Who are we to judge?
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